Now that it has been a few weeks, I feel adapted to this small town of Malakal, its people, and those I am working with at the UN. It has been nothing but learning, on going, trial after trial of coping mechanisms to deal with the challenges, and
in the end, they are no different than any challenge we have anywhere. As David Brazier tells in his book – all has to do with fire – the emotions, the passions, the blames, and the task is always to contain, and make good use of it, instead of leaving at mercy of wind, more gossip, complaints, etc.
This trip certainly has provide me with uncountable opportunities to reflect upon things, to accept reality as it is, always, and to have patience and in fact it seems that people around me perceive my presence not only maternal… but also, as someone wrote – a soothing presence.
I will always remember Malakal, and at any time it would be my choice to work here, as opposed to Khartoum. The people seems more genuine, reality is in the field, not so much in offices, and the feeling here is that people in the big cities know so little about the reality of the day to day work. It is true.
My goals are specific now, and even though they may seem little and narrow (I always see my self as shallow and simple. Hahaha). The Welfare Committee is active, and we had a successful and profitable Happy Night – imagine me organizing a party – going in the day and cleaning up, setting up tables, etc. and in between my arrangements and the evening, it rained… but stop and we had a great time. The most strange party I have been so far. There was beer – lots of them, and we sold almost all… coca cola, sprite and water. That was all. We have a great freezer and all drinks were deliciously cold. The military brought the music (a mix of Indian and reggae and salsa) and we dance literally from 7 to 11 PM when curfew rules are obeyed… it was amazing. We were 4 women for more than 50 men, and to see the men dancing together was a scene of a movie, all very energetic, moving their hips, and I guess trying to enjoy as much as possible. We all did, piled the chairs and all was cleaned up. The military is very organized really… as Bruno said, despite my leftist tendencies, I know I am rigid and love authority. Haha
The training in Khartoum was very interested and I may do part of it here in Malakal. It was about Mission Readiness and I was proud Heleen and I among others, organize my trip by the book… all the documents and everything looked after. The second part of the training was on Buddy system, which could become a Peer support system of a kind, but this is far from a reality in Malakal. And the third portion was about Stress Management. The materials are great, and I will be using some of them. Now I have a weekly reflection for the staff, notes of acknowledgement of something noticeable and relevant like collaboration, challenge well cope with, achievement, improvement, etc. I must be thinking about how to have these hard work staff feeling better about themselves. Last week I wrote that machines work better if well maintained, and people work far better if they take good care of themselves. Some people enjoyed that.
Another goal I have is about the garden, and we will make an Earth Day (fake date !) sometime early June and we will all give a plant, a seed or a little tree to all staff, to look after and take care, water it, etc. we will see.
This week I met a very wise man from Afghanistan, and we talked about acceptance. He has been annoyed with the complaints about trivia like the cleaners are not doing a good job. He said we must always agree that what is happening here is better than many parts of the world, and he doubt some of the UN staff here, who come from Pakistan, Ghana, Rwanda, Cambodia really understand that their lives here is better than their lives in their countries, that’s why they choose to work with the UN. I thought about what he said, and once again, realized that we all can benefit from being here, but each person has to understand first that what s/he is doing is meaningful for others.
I went with a few guys for supper in a local restaurant. First they did not give us utensils, oh my god. But I had the best tool – my chopsticks that I got from Launette at Orion. The flies, or insects or mosquitoes… who knows which were all around us, and the owner of the restaurant placed something burning next to my chair that immediately made me think of Catholic churches, incenses’ or something like… the smell was overpowering, and the smoke, not only the insects left, we did too… not a good experience. But we insisted and another day we went to another one and we ate barbecue beef – small pieces of meat that could be like stew, but the hardest thing to chew, and lots of skin… so I am becoming vegetarian, and eating frugal… I am sure this pattern will change as soon as I am around Paulo and the other chefs in Vancouver, and before there, as soon as I arrive in Sao Paulo, at Anamaria or anywhere else….
I was proud that the modest library that I decided to build in Malakal has already 14 books, most donated. It would be great to have more, and I think of us reading so many books, and wanting to dispose them. If I come back, I must bring books, DVD and other items for the leisure. So far we did not set yet a ping pong table but I am convinced that we will be having contests when the rain starts. We are all prepared, my big boots that Thales gave me - # 40 feet, and a plastic blanket that will be my pseudo umbrella here.
Last week while in Khartoum I went to hear a professor – old Sudanese man – talk about the marks of the faces of old Sudanese. He has marks on his cheeks. It was a fascinating topic, and the discussion was worth every minute. There was a woman who raised genital mutilation, and another one who referred to the west fascination with tattoos and make up, which all seemed related in his anthropological views of identity, marking your body with beautifying designs, etc. He wrote a book, and I went to talk to him, but his book was not available at the place, so… one of this things we enjoy as it happens…
It is Saturday and the offices are quiet, and I started my day talking to Conrad in the phone, something that is so good, listening to familiar and dear voices, getting emails and all. This is not a pressure, but you must know that email is not only virtually possible, it make reality far less virtual to me. Be well, love, always
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